portraits + clouds

completely...

2012-02-01T12:43:00.001-08:00

OVERwhelmed...Ian is having a difficult day and Ginger is worried.
I've a horrible headache, and my brain won't stop thinking of things that make me anxious.

Lord, please be here today...

Gift Of Life

2012-01-23T13:28:00.000-08:00

A little time, a little money...I found a way to spare both in the hopes i can save someone's life.
i wish i could be the match for Ian, but someone else might be!

visit marrow.org and just take one minute to see how every single person adds to the possibility of hope. what an AMAZING time we live in that this is an option we have!!

I'm inspired by my darling Ian, and sweet Gwen; and the pure gift of what a healthy life is.

i joined...maybe in 30 days, or 30 years from now i help give that gift.

Please consider for yourself!

no mistakes

2012-01-19T14:19:00.000-08:00

Read this post on a friend's blog, whose family is experiencing their own painful trial of waiting on God. Her words, and the blog she linked to, kept me up half the night...sobered in sad thoughtfulness. I left this comment on Jamie's post, and thought i'd post it here as well.

Ended up looking over almost the entire blog about Tripp, thinking about him, the preciousness of his existence, the testimony of Courtney, and how we have the hope of knowing there is no wasted life. Baby Tripp had a very specific purpose, though the eyes of the rest of the world may have seen his life as simply unnecessary.
The suffering and death of babies has to be so agonizing to the Lord...even more so than for me, for us (though my human mind can't even comprehend it). And from that perspective i have to know that there's an infinitely greater eternal work happening.
I don't know. I'm also realizing that it's not my job to figure this all out but just to trust that somehow it is good, and that He makes all things beautiful.

Just so you know, Tripp died on the 14th, just a few days ago, his memorial was yesterday. He is free and whole...how marvelous, how wonderful.

And the Lord loves Ian...and He doesn't make mistakes.

News from Ginger

2012-01-18T17:23:00.000-08:00

"Today was a better day. We are now back on the hematology/oncology floor and out of the ICU, I forgot to mention that we moved here yesterday. Ian wasn't as anxious, they kept his doses the same as yesterday, so I think it helped that he went without a wean for today. He also enjoyed his thickened milk and baby food and seemed to do well with his physical therapy. The doctors are keeping us here until he can be weaned off of the oxygen, which may take a couple more days. He is on a very low setting, but needs it to maintain his saturations for now.

Julie brought Henry to the hospital so we had a nice visit, and he seems to be doing fine with his cold. He is hilarious, he just walks around the cafeteria screaming so people will look at him, and then he makes friends with them. Julie is taking excellent care of him and it looks like he is having a great time at her house playing in her beautiful backyard with her dogs, who seem to really like him.

Thanks to everyone for continuing to remember our family! Love to all."

latest from Ginger...

2012-01-17T11:25:00.000-08:00

“Had a very nice weekend seeing Joey and Caid (and Henry) thanks to my mom and dad who both stayed a night with Ian in the hospital so we could spend some time together. We also got a visits from Grammy Wren & Colleen, Auntie Trisha & Micaela and Auntie Julie and Uncle Joel.

We never really made it out if ICU. After spending a few hours on the hematology/oncology floor, they decided that Ian was working a little harder at breathing than they were comfortable with, so we got moved back to ICU. They have planned to transfer us a couple of times since then, but it hasn’t happened yet. He had an assessment from a therapist for feeding on Friday that he didn’t really pass, so he was restricted to 1 ounce of baby food twice a day for practice and no liquids or solids. He was assessed again this morning, and continued to have a bit of trouble, so they will do a swallow study tomorrow to get a bit more information. The swallow study involves drinking barium and watching with an X-ray to make sure he doesn’t aspirate anything while swallowing. This is apparently a typical side effect from being intubated for such a long time and just being overall weak from being so sick, as Ian was.

Unfortunately, it looks like we will be here a bit longer than I had been thinking and hoping for as of last week. He is continuing to get stronger every day, we are working hard at playing to try to get strength, stamina and coordination back.”

2012-01-15T23:09:00.000-08:00

Wren and i went to Phoenix and saw Ian this weekend...i'm tired. we only stayed for one night, but holding him far outweighed the time and energy spent.
i loved feeling his tiny hand hold my finger tightly as he slept. i hated seeing him so drugged, feeble, sick and sad. i loved seeing him smile for his mommy. i loved hearing Henry laugh when he saw us.
i hated to leave.

i drove out of Phoenix today with an aching heart and overwhelmed mind, and arrived in LA emotionally and mentally raw. thrown straight back into the tumult of life in my family, it's only within the last hour or two that i've really realized how frayed i am...thoughtless, short-tempered, distracted...and finally crying in the bathroom like a baby. i'm finding myself sorrowful and grieved.
God's going to make this all okay, but right now my mind and heart just aren't handling everything very well.

i miss Ian and Henry and the rest of the family already, and i can't ask you enough to keep praying for our little precious boy...

supporttheadams.com

grateful

2012-01-11T15:40:00.000-08:00

Ian was extubated today, and is slowly continuing to come off of his sedatives (and slough of other meds).

And Ginger got to finally hold him today...

We're feeling very thankful.

a little change of pace, i know...

2012-01-10T20:24:00.000-08:00

but i couldn't resist.

latest from Ginger...

2012-01-08T11:31:00.001-08:00

"Everything still okay; however, since coming off of the ECMO, Ian has had trouble maintaining his temperature and has had the low heartrate. Although his heart function has continued to improve, his heartrate stays low and that and the body temperature don't really make any sense to doctors or "fit" with other things going on.
It cannot be attributed to any of the drugs that he is on and they have pretty much checked everything they can at this point. The doctors from the beginning could not really understand why he had respiratory failure, since his lungs were sick, but never looked bad enough in the chest x-rays to have needed life support like ECMO for the lungs.

I asked if the weird bloodwork -specifically the low hemoglobin (which is the red bloodcells that transport oxygen) could have explained his trouble saturating, but doctors have since given him many blood transfusions of hemoglobin and bloodwork has had normal counts for a while now. Yet he still needs a lot of support from the ventilator and didn't tolerate much weaning of the oxygen settings yesterday.

Doctors here are very honest in that they may not have any answers for this, since they have checked on almost every possible explanation. They plan today to check his adrenal function, since one number on his thyroid function was slightly low today, when it was previously normal. They said this often can happen with very sick kids, which is what Ian is, but would investigate it anyway just to see if it yields anything. At this point the Endocrinologist is the only specialist who hasn't been consulted on Ian's case.

Please pray for either a mysterious improvement or answers (less likely) for the doctors, so they can help him improve. The important thing is that he is still stable on the ventilator."

Ian's Progress

2012-01-04T18:56:00.000-08:00

Ginger posted this about an hour ago...

Lots of progress since I last posted. Ian had an echocardiogram yesterday and the cardiologist was very pleased. His heart is functioning much better now. He also had an MRI and a spinal tap to look for any Central Nervous System evidence of HLH. The doctor said those may not show anything, since he has been on the treatment for several days now, but ordered them anyway in case they may be helpful. For the spinal tap, they gave extra sedation and pain medication for, so he didn't even wake up for it, which was a huge relief for me. We will hopefully have the results of those tomorrow morning.
I was able to talk to the hematologist about some questions I had regarding the bone marrow transplant process. They are running the genetic test on Ian (which takes 3-4 weeks for results) to determine if they can find the mutation for HLH on the genes that they currently know about. This test is extremely expensive, which is why they are not running the test on the rest of our family. If they can identify the gene (best case scenario, as opposed to it coming back normal, which can mean that the mutation is on a gene that they haven't identified yet) then they can run a single gene test on Caid and Henry to see if they have the mutation or not. The best case scenario then would be that neither Caid or Henry have the mutation AND one of them is a bone marrow match. Siblings have the best chance of being a match, since they have the DNA from the same two people as Ian (parents!) as opposed to Joey or I, which only share half our DNA with Ian. However, if Caid or Henry have the mutation too, their bone marrow would be equally faulty and they would need a transplant too. Also, if Ian has the mutation on a gene that hasn't been identified, then it would not be identifiable on Caid or Henry which would leave us to a scary waiting game to find out if they have this same syndrome which could and would eventually be triggered by a virus.

So, this is what we need prayer for:
1) Gene mutation for Ian's HLH identified
2) Caid and Henry don't have HLH
3) Caid or Henry are a match for Ian
4) Bone marrow transplant takes and is successful

twittered

2012-01-03T16:51:00.001-08:00

We, the family and friends of the family Adams (those being, Joey, Ginger, Caid, Ian and Henry) now have a Twitter account:https://twitter.com/#!/supporttheadams. Please follow us and stay updated on needs and information~~Thank you.

Ian update...

2012-01-03T09:07:00.001-08:00

Ginger wrote this morning...

"Ian is continuing to improve, Praise God! He still has a very low heartrate and some other heart issues, they will be doing another echocardiogram to determine function. They also will be doing, probably tomorrow, an MRI and spinal tap to look for any Central Nervous System evidence of HLH. They will be sending blood samples today for the genetic test, but it takes several weeks to receive the results. He gets his second round of chemotherapy today and another higher dose of steroids. They have begun some weaning of the drugs, but he is still very sedated since he is still on the ventilator. He is still very sick, but is no longer the sickest kid in the PICU!

Treatment for Ian that we are getting right now is only to to suppress the life threatening inflammatory process that HLH triggers in response to the virus he caught. Remission is always temporary and the only way for him to be cured is to receive a bone marrow transplant. Please pray fervently for this. From information that the hospital library provided to me on HLH, I read this morning that even with treatment, only 21-26% of patients with (the genetic) HLH survive 5 years. The only hope for a cure is a successful bone marrow transplant.

Joey and Caid went home to LA yesterday and will go back to work and school tomorrow. Please pray for Caid, since I think the family separation will be hardest on him. Please also pray that Henry will continue to get better and stay well. Additionally, please pray that Caid and Henry do not have HLH. They will likely be tested after we get Ian's results, but right now doctors don't know all of the genes that can carry the mutation, so the test really only carries weight if it is positive on the genes that they know about.

Thanks to everyone for all of the love, prayers and support."

Latest from Ginger.

2011-12-31T00:06:00.000-08:00

Latest from Ginger. Please keep praying for Ian...

"Henry continues to do well. Joey and I were updated by the doctors today on Ian. There is still uncertainty about what caused this with Ian but HLH was the theory that was discussed. There are two types of HLH, and my understanding is that a virus can trigger an overly aggressive immunological response that would be very similar to the rapid deteriorati...on that we witnessed with Ian.

The problem that we are facing is that HLH doesn't have a test that there is a positive or negative result, it is more of meeting a certain number of criteria. Ian "technically" meets the minimum number of criteria, although the doctor here tells us that he has never seen a case of HLH without certain elevated antibodies, which Ian doesn't have.

I am feeling very concerned and extremely burdened because the doctors are not certain either way. The treatment for HLH is steroids and low dose chemotherapy. My understanding is that if he has HLH it would help him now and prevent further life threatening incidents like this, but in the absence of a definitive diagnosis, I feel sick about exposing Ian to those treatments. Please pray for wisdom and divine guidance for us and the doctors in this. Love to everyone."

on our knees

2011-12-29T14:32:00.000-08:00

Sweet Ian, all i can hope and pray for is that i will hold you in my arms again soon...!

that you and Henry will be free of this plaguing illness in your tiny bodies

that you will be strong and healthy

that i will see you walk

and thank Jesus for His gift to us of your precious life.

Ian and Henry are both suffering from pneumonia in Phoenix Children's Hospital.

Ian is still in a medically induced coma and on morphine and blood thinners, therefore causing a risk of bleeding in the brain. Ginger wrote this last night:

"Last night [the 27th] was a very hard night for us. Ian seemed to be doing better, and was even playing and laughing a little but then suddenly could not keep his oxygen levels up and they progressively got worse. After unsuccessful interventions, they bagged him and then intubated him but could not stabilize him. They decided to transfuse him with hemoglobin and platelets, which he had been dangerously getting lower on the last few days. It was also decided to put him on an ECMO, which is a type of life support that acts as an artificial lung. His blood is pumped through the machine to oxygenate it and then pumped back into his body. He has to be on heparin to keep the blood thin, but this runs the risk of developing a brain bleed. Please pray specifically that this will not happen, since the only remedy would be to take him off the ECMO, even if he was not ready.

Henry seems stable and oxygenates well, although he has low platelets. Please pray that he gets better and not worse.We praise God that Ian is alive and stable. We praise the Lord for Henry and ask that he gets better. We are so thankful to have wonderful support from our family, friends, and even those that don't know us".

engaged to my best friend

2011-12-25T22:59:00.000-08:00

tonight...

2011-12-22T23:48:00.000-08:00

i had a very sweet time with a new old friend. we ate chicken pie. i cut her hair. we scattered flower petals.
good night~~

thousands of words

2011-12-15T23:05:00.000-08:00

Recently...

Caid climbed on a wall...

There were two snuggly babies on my pillow...

Dad showed me how to smoke a grape vine twig...

I hung out with Pip, (who is getting married on Saturday)...

and Caid amended his Christmas list.

Just doesn't look right.

2011-12-09T13:17:00.001-08:00

For along time I've felt that the letter G should come before F in the alphabet. These are the kind of things I think about.

cam and wren

2011-12-06T19:18:00.001-08:00

Cam: Hey Mom. Wanna know what i hate?

Wren: Uh oh...I'm scared.

Cam: (laughs) Why?

Wren: (kind of laughs) I'm just scared!

Cam: Don't worry, it's not you.

Wren: Uh oh---what?

Cam: It's not you.

Wren: Still…

Cam: You're like, third.

Wren: Third??

Cam: Or, i dunno, fifth or something.

Wren: Do i have to be anything??

(for the record, i asked cam and wren to pose really quick for a picture for me and, well, that's what they did)

you did, little girl puppet.

2011-12-05T23:40:00.001-08:00

Something you hear on the TV if you live in a house with small children.

Girl Puppet: Hey Elmo!

Elmo: Helloooo!

GP: Did i just hear you say 'hooray for underpants'?"

Whaaa

2011-11-30T12:12:00.001-08:00

It's the last say of November already. Did you realize that? Because I didn't.

2011-11-23T23:31:00.000-08:00

Caid's Christmas list...(that first one is "spinosaurus", for all you non-paleontologists out there)

heh

2011-11-22T10:44:00.001-08:00

i get a huge kick out of knowing that the search words that most often bring random people to my blog have, for weeks, been "brazilian chicks" and "patrick stewart" (sometimes accompanied by "mask").

this morning

2011-11-21T13:58:00.001-08:00

henry one (looking for danger)

ian babe (with mashed banana face)

pretty girls with persimmons

2011-11-14T21:21:00.001-08:00

Ginger asked me, "Colleen, do you know where the perfect place is to kiss a babe?"

"No, where?' i smiled.

"C'mere, Caid," she said, and gently took his face in her hands...

2 years

2011-11-13T22:52:00.001-08:00

heavy with the impossible burden tonight.

for the ten thousandth time asking God why

Gwennie is so alive and vibrant in my heart it feels like it's happening all over again

didn't i just hold her? didn't i just feel her tiny little girl hands on my arm...didn't i just kiss her sweet face, and hear her little voice, brimming with first words?

this week is going to be very hard...

please pray for Ginger and the family.

i don't know what to say...but if my heart is still breaking like it is, i can't imagine theirs.

11.11.11

2011-11-11T11:19:00.001-08:00

i'm hungry!

2011-11-10T12:03:00.001-08:00

So much better. Prayers worked :)

This morning i took this picture from Joey & Ginger's window facing out over the hills...a cool November day. They say we have more rain coming tomorrow...i can't wait.

I just indulged myself in a super cute pair of Toms. When they come, and if they fit, i'll post a picture. :)

Have you seen the opening for the Office season 7? (the best version i could find is flipped :/ but it's still good)

I am contented today...in spite of things really not being much different than usual. This morning when he called to wake me, Chad prayer for blessings on my day, and on his. I think that's why i'm feeling so happy.

2011-11-08T14:52:00.001-08:00

so. sick.

oww my skin--pt 3 (...?)

2011-11-07T15:58:00.000-08:00

i am a zombie. and not for anything Halloween related...besides, that was over a week ago guys. i know it feels like it should only be about october 15th or so, but it's NOVEMBER 7TH. (that was mostly directed at myself)

i mean i'm beginning to feel a very familiar and disquieting dizziness, increasing weakness, and aching in my joints that led to my mystery illness of the entire month of september. the lack of appetite is what really tips me off...because i can ALWAYS eat food. i can't even bring myself to open up a yogurt for lunch. which was almost 3 hours ago.

also, this morning i left my phone at home, almost forgot to put on shoes, and somewhere between the building i work in and starbucks 2 blocks away, i lost my sweatshirt. and it's freezing. and i threw away half my coffee because it made me nauseous. coffee i paid for.

WHAT THE WHAT.

blady bla

2011-11-06T23:30:00.000-08:00

Well, tomorrow i'm starting my second to last week on Ricky Gervais. I'm happy to say i'll miss it...happy because it's really nice to like your job, and i'm crossing my fingers it gets picked up for a 4th season!

Last night Anna M took Ginger out for coffee, so Ioni was delightedly helping feed Henry. I think this picture just speaks for itself.

I've decided i'm going to have a new segment on here where i share things that i think smell really good.

Here's a review Laura wrote of a show headlining a band from London called Still Corners that i saw with her and Chad on Saturday. I took the picture with the article...you can see i am a seasoned professional with only the most high-tech equipment.

And for those who are still in post-Halloween mourning, here you go.

perspective

2011-11-02T11:40:00.000-07:00

You don't have a Soul, You are a Soul. You have a body.

-C.S. Lewis

happiest halloween

2011-11-01T11:43:00.000-07:00

something's different...

2011-10-31T13:07:00.000-07:00

Sometimes your sister uses your work computer over the weekend...so you come in on monday to find your Cintiq skewed at a weird angle, your desktop covered in a guy dressed as pokey, and a copy of your favorite Sargent painting gruesomely defaced.

i call that a good start to a monday.

good morning

2011-10-28T09:41:00.000-07:00

Don't you dare get between Caid and his toasted English Muffin with cream cheese and blackberry jam.

autumn odes

2011-10-27T12:59:00.000-07:00

Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns. ~George Eliot

Bittersweet October. The mellow, messy, leaf-kicking, perfect pause between the opposing miseries of summer and winter. ~Carol Bishop Hipps

No spring nor summer beauty hath such grace
As I have seen in one autumnal face. ~John Donne

photo by me...2008 :)

overcompensating

2011-10-26T11:33:00.000-07:00

Guys that buzz around driving deafening ridiculous cars and bikes are pansies.

29th &c~

2011-10-24T15:13:00.000-07:00

It was my birthday on saturday...and it was a lovely, low-key day. Chad gave me some axe-cop comics, Alec and Sarah gifted me with a generous donation to World Vision, and my dad gave me his iPhone! I so did *not* expect that.
<<--There, as you see, is my face. Photographed by a hipster app on said iPhone. I feel so cool and hip it's a little uncomfortable.
Chad tells me i am now "part of the machine".

Yesterday i helped babysit at church, along with Reid and Jeanette. Reid spent most of the time on the floor getting pummeled and bossed around by Caid and Ioni. At one point, as Reid lay motionless under a table, i heard this:

Caid: You're in the furnace!

Reid: I know...it burns so bad!

Caid: It'll burn you to BONE!

just rad.

2011-10-21T12:58:00.000-07:00

Have i mentioned that i'm completely enamored with St. Vincent's Annie Clark?

oh that's right, i have!

natural

2011-10-20T17:46:00.001-07:00

quetzacoatlus

2011-10-19T20:19:00.000-07:00

Ginger (in the kitchen doing dishes): I'm cleaning this quetzacoatlus.

Joey (on the computer working): You gotta clean those quetzacoatluses.

Me (from my room): No one likes a dirty quetzacoatlus.

Joey: Right. Show me *one* person who does.

Me: (pause) I can't.

Joey: Know why?

Me: Why?

Joey: Cause there aren't any.

a glimpse into hopelessness

2011-10-18T10:08:00.000-07:00

When i am confronted with the things that people have and still continue to suffer...isolation, endless starvation, in this age of so much "enlightenment" and "progression", i just want to curl up in bed and never wake up. These days i am choosing the confrontation...It weighs on me like a physical burden that no amount of monetary giving, or prayer can seem to lift.
Here, in this great country, we can joke all we want about the horrors of our "suffering" (see previous post) But most people have no idea--I have no idea--what real disparity of life is.
Lord, what else can i do? Please...please tell me what else i can do...

no

2011-10-14T10:57:00.001-07:00

alivugber

2011-10-13T12:22:00.000-07:00

well, i have another bad infection. again. doesn't matter what/where/how...i might as well have gotten it from, you know, looking at a tree! all i know is that my immune system is shot, and that i'm exhausted and everything hurts. today i start on my 4th (or 5th?...they're all running together) regimen of antibiotics in the past year. i wonder when i will just not be sick anymore. sad face.

stay put

2011-10-11T14:58:00.000-07:00

ever i'm waiting
today there is achy-ness
the wond'ring of when

...sometimes God is simply silent.

2011-10-11T10:49:00.000-07:00

waking up was confusing

2011-10-10T09:49:00.000-07:00

Yesterday i blasted lady gaga to bug chad while we were driving. I can't remember why, but i'm sure it was a very good reason.
Anyway, it backfired on me--i dreamed about lady gaga all night last night. My brain even made up new lady gaga songs. One of them was about grocery shopping.
Very, very, epic grocery shopping.

And i was wearing a Patrick Stewart mask.

achoo

2011-10-08T22:23:00.000-07:00

i have a cold.

birthday!

2011-10-07T09:43:00.000-07:00

The twins are 1 year old today. I can't believe how far they've come in a year.

I took this picture on my phone this morning. I barely got the photo snapped before Henry was on top of me...drool, spit up and all. Ian followed 3 seconds later.

...happy, crazy boys on their birthday!

what the fuh

2011-10-06T12:01:00.000-07:00

Leave it to the Onion to never miss a beat! Honestly, one of the best pieces i've seen so far recognizing the enormity of Steve Jobs' life and work, and the impact of his death. A classic "it's funny 'cause it's true"!

It's already sparked an increased thoughtfulness in the creative and progressive world...there is an air of melancholy in the studio today. i guess i never knew how many people in the animation industry considered him as a hero.

We think we know so much...but we can't stop people from getting cancer...we can't stop them from dying. It doesn't matter how rich and famous and adored you are.
(blah blah philosophical mumblings.....)

The days ahead just get curiouser and curiouser...

baby baby

2011-10-04T11:40:00.000-07:00

Recently, as i was mindlessly sorting through a clean load of my laundry, i suddenly pulled out a teeny tiny white onesie. I don't know how it got in with my clothes, and i don't really care (though i wouldn't put it past Henry to already be sneaking into my room and causing trouble).

cutest. surprise. ever.

rain really does make everything better.

2011-10-03T15:04:00.000-07:00

i think i just found my new source of stress relief.

*update-no, really, i've been listening to it for about 8 minutes while i work and my headache is going away.

**2nd update-i heard it's going to rain this week and i'm feeling like a kid on Christmas!

what am i supposed to be doing again...?

2011-09-29T13:44:00.000-07:00

veeeeery hard to focus today.
saw the doctor this morning and i'm now more informed and slightly relieved about a few things, and yet more discouraged about others. i am feeling so mentally out of it...! i kind of just want to sleep until tomorrow.

on a happier note, here's a cute ian picture:

don't mind me, i'm just a restless twenty-something.

2011-09-28T14:44:00.000-07:00

Feeling itchy today (and not just because of my allergy-ridden skin). A mental agitation...an emotional rough patch...a sense of being trapped inside a box. I literally can't sit still.
Maybe it's all the hot weather, no rain, a few teasing clouds once a month or so...
Perhaps the worries of the complications of life, the passing of days, the potential for missed opportunities...all the driving, the traffic, the smog, the society, computers, televisions, phones, the constant stimulation, the sprawling cities and endless freeways...

I go through periods of overwhelming urges to go far away; to somewhere beautiful, chilly, green, majestic. 5 years ago, on my old blog, i wrote this post about moving to Ireland.

And years ago i also took this picture while my mom sister and i were visiting Oregon.

I've been to Austria, but i didn't quite make it to anywhere like Hallstatt...where the picture on the right was taken.
Right now i'd give anything to go there. Somewhere old, somewhere peaceful, somewhere i can feel cool breezes, breathe clean air, climb high, emerald mountains.

The need for simplicity, beauty, freshness, inspiration.

Maybe...someday.

oww my skin--pt 3

2011-09-27T09:44:00.000-07:00

So, i'm allergic to penicillin. Guess how i found out?

:D

seriously

2011-09-26T10:46:00.000-07:00

Chad and i went to the LA County Fair over the weekend. Whilst in the section with all the farm animals, i heard this little gem:

Woman: What is that??
Man: That is a big ass pig.
Woman: Ew.

shutup

2011-09-24T11:42:00.000-07:00

regret

2011-09-23T16:16:00.000-07:00

today i encountered a situation where i felt i needed to say something.
i sat, and sat, and sat...thinking of what i needed to say, but how afraid i was to speak.

and i never did...

and now i just can't let it go. the conviction gnawing inside me...
sometimes i feel like the most epic of cowards.

i had a venti americano this morning

2011-09-22T15:15:00.000-07:00

Well, thank goodness i only had to languish in a crowded assembly room for one day. Look how proud i am to do my civic duty!

My sister did this drawing for me on monday...
It's been a looong week.Yesterday i thought i was regressing health wise...but doing better today.

Speaking of which, i have a doctor's appointment today to discuss my blood. :D
In the past year or two i've had my blood taken more times than i can remember...and i can say that the big fat bruise that developed after the nurse took blood last week...? not what's supposed to happen.
But she talked to me about Halloween raves and how awesome they are while she did it so it's cool.

Today is Bilbo and Frodo's birthday, by the way. Also known as Hobbit Day. Yes, it's a thing.

Caid is steadily becoming a Miyazaki fan. He absolutely LOVES My Neighbor Totoro and hums multiple songs from the score. I'm so proud!!
His favorite part, he says, is "when they get the acorns"...also "the part with the goat". His favorite character is catbus. He likes to make noises like catbus does...he sounds like the garbage disposal.

OH i forgot...i found a pure white hair smack in the middle of my bangs yesterday. In my bangs--which i look at multiple times a day. Which means it wasn't there day before yesterday. (of course, being me, i pulled it out and have since glued it into my journal.) How does that HAPPEN?? also, ITALICS!

Joey said that he saw a dead owl on the freeway the other day. An owl.

i really should be working.

noooooooo

2011-09-19T21:24:00.000-07:00

jury duty tomorrow.

oww my skin--pt 2

2011-09-18T20:30:00.000-07:00

not much new...just that the mystery illness continues. spent the weekend in ontario with a bum right arm due to overly swollen lymph nodes, and a persistent low-grade fever, among other things.

i currently resemble an elderly woman with arthritis in both knees. gonna try to go to work tomorrow anyway! or i might just go insane with guilt.
this is also, of course, the week i am on call for jury duty. but BLESSING OF BLESSINGS, i checked in tonight and i don't have to go tomorrow. thank you, LORD.

it's 8:30 and i'm going to bed. maybe i really am an old lady now...

oww my skin

2011-09-13T23:17:00.000-07:00

sick.
again.
body hates me. pray i can see the doctor in the morning.

whyyyyyy

(and THIS for those who don't know.)

huh. okay.

2011-09-12T13:04:00.000-07:00

A few days ago someone found it by image searching cloud pictures. Then this morning, someone found my blog by googling brazilian chicks.

That all rounds out pretty well, i think.

i wrote this really fast...

2011-09-11T23:24:00.000-07:00

10 years ago today i was an 18 year old fresh-faced high school graduate and had just started junior college. PCC what-what!
i was obsessed with lord of the rings, drawing comics, had a hopeless crush on elijah wood, and aspired to maybe go to art center or something someday. i was afraid of the future. i was overweight, depressed and afraid of everyone and everything, convinced no one would ever love me and i would never do anything useful with my pitiful self...but i loved my stories, my family, my cousins, and making movies with them. i loved singing. i knew God was around somewhere....so i slogged ahead. (most of the time).
we still lived at atchison...i loved that house. james/joey/jeff/matt/anna...some or all of those people lived with us. we had olivia and quidam. my grandparents were alive and still living by themselves. sarah had stared her artsy fartsy LACHSA and i was jealous of her. there was no caid...joey and ginger weren't even married yet!

10 years ago there was no facebook, no twitter, no myspace. i had only had a cell phone for about a year, most other people in my family didn't ( i remember, in particular, joey holding out for quite a while and everyone being really mad at him). digital photography was still new-fangled and i still took film to vons to get developed. we carried around video cameras. took polaroids before it was cool.

10 years ago today i remember going into the kitchen and seeing crazy stuff going on in the news on the little tv my dad was watching while making breakfast. planes crashing into buildings thousands of miles away...tragic. i watched the second one hit, live, right before my eyes, and felt a twist in my stomach. i hardly had time to process the enormity before i grabbed a piece of toast and had to rush out to my english class.

needless to say, we didn't learn about essay writing or analyze short stories that day.

i cried a lot. my heart was burdened with a weight i had never felt before...life as i knew...both for myself, and for humanity, had changed forever. in ways i saw immediately, in ways i would only see unfold over years, and in ways i still have not seen.

a LOT of things have changed in ten years. just in this little life i call mine. but the 11th of September was one of them. i still can't think of it, i mean really remember what it was, with out shedding tears. and i'm glad for that! i never ever want to get used to what happened.

i don't care if this blog was corny or whatever. i know there are millions and bajillions out there just like it. but it's just what i'm thinking about~~~

good night...count yourself blessed to be able to have spent these last 10 years growing and changing and learning, rejoicing, and being able to grieve.

thank you Lord for my own little miracles. my own little trials. thank you i can feel You closer...though i know it's still not close enough. may others be able to find Your hand in strife...and give people comfort in Your sovereignty today.

~

arliufgva;rui

2011-09-09T11:13:00.000-07:00

i hate hot. i hate this HOTTT. i also hate ants.

hot and ants need to die now...ALL DIE!!

hey

2011-09-06T15:31:00.000-07:00

it's a new week...starting on a tuesday!

i just realized it's 3:30 and i haven't had lunch.

today...

2011-09-02T11:58:00.000-07:00

...i'm thankful it is friday. and a long weekend, at that. there is a lot i need to do and catch up on in the next dew days.

...i realized that the year is 3/4 over. WHAT?

...the house will be finally emptied, and it still hasn't really clicked. never walk barefoot on that grass again? never pick figs from the trees? never sleep in my mom's childhood bedroom...so many things...i can't imagine life without this home...
i'm trying not to think about it too much (haha). i'll probably write more later when i don't have work i should be doing : /

...i'm also really sick of this government. but who isn't? that's boring. who wants to hear about that.

all the leaves are brown...because the sun burned them up

2011-08-29T16:02:00.000-07:00

there is something very very wrong in that it's been over 100 degrees every day and stores and various businesses are beginning to display fall merchandise. is there nothing sacred anymore??

having a moderately tough day today...it doesn't seem to matter how much sleep i get or how much coffee i drink...some days i just submit to an achy head full of cotton.

earlier, i found pretty adequate expression in alliteration...

feeling fairly feebly fatigued.

i'm prouder of that than i should be, i think.

2011-08-25T12:30:00.000-07:00

Little Ian had surgery again this week...and now he (and Henry, too) has a cold :( pray for his little body to stay strong and fight off sickness and infection!

I tried to run a couple of days ago. Seriously, it was mostly walking, with little spurts of light jogging...and i still had horrible pain in my knee by only a mile & a half. Ended the day with frozen peas strapped to my leg and almost unable to walk. So bummed. I miss running so much.

Last night i dreamed that Chad and my sister were both killed in a horrible accident. I can think of a number of things in the past few days that could have triggered this...but i haven't had a dream quite that devastating in a long time. I remember crying til my eyes and throat were dry...despairing...praying, begging God to let me wake up from it all and find it was a horrible dream. But it went on so long, and it was so real, and my heart was so broken.
Chad called me to wake me up this morning. The relief that swept over me as i heard his voice and reality hit was like a wave of water. Kind of like a few days ago...but naturally, even greater and sweeter. And i was exhausted.

sheesh, brain...stressed out, much??

backin up

2011-08-22T17:03:00.000-07:00

First watch THIS.

Then watch THIS.

i guess i'm not giving up on the internet quite yet.

itch i can't scratch

2011-08-22T14:32:00.000-07:00

It's been months now since i've done any artwork. i miss painting so much i could cry...i feel the need all over me, like a rash under my skin that i can't get rid of (cue jokes about my hygiene). Lord please help me find somewhere to be able to paint again soon...and feel free to give me a kick in the butt to get me moving.

command z

2011-08-18T14:48:00.000-07:00

Night before last i had one of those dreams that gives one the rare opportunity of being REALLY happy when you're rudely awakened by your alarm in the morning...
In my dream i decided to buy a new car--I have a job now, so i can totally afford it!--i thought to myself ( conveniently forgetting that it's only 4 months long). I mean, my current car totally has 2 dents in it...i can't possibly drive that around anymore.
So i bought a super cute awesome red Subaru...and in my dream it was pretty much exactly this model. And i loved it.

2 days later, driving blissfully up Hill Ave, a foreign man in a black SUV decided to smash my brand new pretty car. No really, he did it on purpose...and as i jumped out to confront him, he just continued to drive on...pushing my now crumpled heap of metal further up the street, blatantly ignoring my yelling and pounding on his windows. His wife in the passenger seat didn't seem to give a crap, either.
~~~
So somehow i got back to my parents'. I remember standing in their driveway, gazing at the mess that was for 2 days my new car...all the tires popped, the hood crushed and bumper in the backseat (suddenly it looked more like it had rolled down a cliff and then caught fire) and crying my eyes out.

I went inside, and got as far as telling my mom that i had bought a car...but before i got past that she asked me, "well, did you get the warranty?"

*

my stomach dropped. my vision wobbled...i thought back to my conversation with the dealer. nothing was said about a warranty! I DIDN'T GET THE WARRANTY!! ohhh noooooo...

As i began to feel sick and dizzy with dread, I told her i was sure it was all in the paperwork, and that i would double check. She was obviously not too pleased with my decision to get the car in the first place and was sure i would make a mistake.
I decided to *not* tell her about the accident.
~~~
The rest of the dream is mostly trying to figure out how to get a warranty before telling the dealer the car was destroyed. Lots more headachingly despairing crying, stress, legal troubles, and somehow the mafia got involved. Cause that makes sense.
~~~
Needless to say, waking up from that dream was like going back in time and undoing a week's worth of life-changing, stupid, bad, bad, VERY BAD decisions. I was so happy and relieved and in such a good mood, that nothing could dampen my spirits yesterday. Not headache, exhaustion, my parents' moving (for the most part), messing up on the same file at work 3 times in a row and having to stay late...nothing.

Last night i dreamed about the apocolypse. You know, lots of fire, crazy people, devastated landscapes, dogs running around...and i wasn't even CLOSE to being as happy to wake up from that.
Think of me what you will.

dear photograph

2011-08-17T17:56:00.000-07:00

I think i'm going to have to do this.

the kids love their netflix

2011-08-16T10:20:00.000-07:00

I'm glad (usually) that i have a job to get me up in the morning. And on days when i don't have to worry about that...? There's always the guaranteed fail safe of squealing babies outside my door by 7:30 :)

A couple of weeks ago whilst getting dinner ready, Joey asked me if i had ever seen [movie i can't remember]. I replied sheepishly that i had, in fact, not.

Joey: (shaking head with a pained smile) Ohhh it's so good...
Me: (regretfully) I know, i know, there are so many good movies i need to see.
Ginger: We have it streaming on Netflix.
Me: Yeah, I need to start a Netflix account.
Caid: (wide-eyed) Netflix can do ANYTHING!

boom

2011-08-16T09:45:00.000-07:00

Slow start at work today...well, slower than normal. Being overtired turns me into a 15 year old PC--including, but not limited to--obsolete programming, frozen a dozen steps behind, frequent crashes and an abundance of viruses!
Sleep has been super stressful lately for reasons of general body self-sabotage and brain-function rebellion to the max...it makes it a real bummer when someone sets off a firework in the middle of the night.

I was supposed to report for jury duty yesterday but i postponed at the last minute. Best decision i've ever made.

55 years

2011-08-13T14:16:00.000-07:00

sorting

packing

disposing

sifting and

watching the sun set on 3 generations of life in this home

hundreds of boxes, thousands of papers, drawings, pictures...

days of dust, tears and memories.

half awake

2011-08-12T11:34:00.000-07:00

feeling extra weary and burdened today...maybe because it's friday? maybe this week's lack of sleep has added up. maybe because my heart is heavy with the pains and plights of people around me, the mystery of circumstances, my own stinging self-consciousness...

i wish i could just make everyone i love happy, i wish i could keep them from hurting. i wish i could knock sense into people and force them to make better decisions. i wish i could force my brain to function normally and not shrink from every good (or unpleasant) thing that i am given.

ok that's enough.

qwik-e-wash

2011-08-11T16:59:00.000-07:00

Sometimes in your rush to get things done efficiently, you find yourself stuck at a drive-thru car wash because the guy in front of you had his car break down inside of it, and then the car wash broke down because of it, and there are 3 cars in que behind you, the sky is growing dark, and the only person minding the whole gas station is a panicked, sweaty, obese little man with curly hair who can't get anything to work and looks like he's gonna cry.

view from work

2011-08-09T08:42:00.000-07:00

these cloudy mornings
the lush hills out my window
green trees and houses

relief

2011-08-04T23:51:00.000-07:00

I said to God that as soon as i had an income, i would find a child to sponsor through World Vision.

3 weeks ago i started a new job...and got my first paycheck...what a glorious day!

So then, with great excitement, i committed myself to this little girl:

Her name is Darlove, and she lives in Haiti. She likes drawing and playing with dolls...and for $35 a month she and her family can be fed, clothed, educated, and protected.
What's one less pair of shoes i can buy for myself...in exchange for giving a beautiful little girl a chance at life? I can live with that.

A few days ago i had what i can only describe as an itching in my soul...that i still was able to give more. I was feeling like i needed to commit sponsorship to another child. I said a lot of things to myself..."now colleen, you just started working, don't go overboard and start throwing your money around!"
"but i should save that money"

"i should apply it to my student loans"
"what if i don't get another job when my season is over in November...?"
...but--
I can also buy less coffee. I can take walks instead of getting a gym membership. I don't need to renew my annual pass to disneyland.
And if i'm unemployed in 3 months? God will provide. All that other stuff is great, often necessary. We have financial obligations in this life. But this...to give to those less fortunate, is part of what we're here for. Jesus tells us so. Some people give EVERYTHING. I can give an extra $35...i know i can.
He has never not provided for me.

And so now i also sponsor Alvin, who lives in Kenya. He loves writing, playing baseball, and helps carry water for his family.
My heart warmed with happiness when i received the confirmation that he was my sponsored child. The itch was gone...for now :)

I can't wait to start corresponding with them.

And i feel so much peace in this...amidst the grief and upheaval around me.

To give is also going to be a gift to me, i think. A gift to these children, and i pray, a gift to the Lord.

It's easy to do, by the way. Becoming a sponsor. Just chick...here.

havin' a laugh

2011-08-02T23:17:00.001-07:00

state of the web

a blessing

2011-08-02T09:02:00.001-07:00

The view out of my window at work is incomparable. Especially when i'm here early enough to see the sun rise over the hills.

be still

2011-07-31T23:47:00.000-07:00

I am learning that i'll just never know the reasons why things are allowed...i must somehow content my self that God does. And that He has promised His allowance of all things in His love. Last week our dear friends Kent and Nicole had to watch their newborn baby boy Everett suddenly succumb to seizures and could be facing permanent mental and physical damage from a blood clot in his brain.

They wrote this in a recent their email update:

Today I (Kent) read John chapters 5 and 6 to Everett. I have read these chapters many times before but as I started reading them I realized it is the first time Everett has ever heard them! This is good news indeed, as Peter the apostle puts it in John 6:68 "You (Jesus) have the words of eternal life." This whole life-changing experience in which we now find ourselves, at the very least, serves to remind us of what is truly important during our very brief, vapor-like existence on this earth. It is awakening a yearning for heaven that admittedly had been suppressed until now. Our lives have seemed charmed perhaps (certainly blessed) and we had become too comfortable on this earth that is NOT our home.

"awakening a yearning for heaven"...Ginger and i talked about that last night. That our hearts are always and forever will belong elsewhere...

Anna and i sang this hymn at Gwennie's memorial...one stanza in particular fills me with the longing for eternity.
To this day there are no other words to express the highest and only real hope i have in this life:

Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: when change and greif are past
All safe and blessèd we shall meet at last.

epoch of the sad, sad orchid

2011-07-28T14:23:00.000-07:00

When i started my job here at WildBrain almost 3 weeks ago, the other 5 people in the room i work in (the background department...we're a TEAM!) decided we needed to spruce the place up a bit. My supervisor brought in some abstract art by his 3 year old daughter and another BG painter brought in a lava lamp, and some drawings by her 6-year old.
i brought a copy of a Sargent painting i had torn out of somewhere...a couple of books, and a very, very, sad, sad orchid.

i was given 2 orchids for my birthday last year. Both lost all their flowers in time, and were a little neglected on the balcony of my old apartment. But still, i saw that they got no direct light and had (somewhat) sufficient water.
One is currently in my bedroom, thriving after the move to J&G's, growing new roots, stems, leaves, and loving the filtered sunshine by the window. It is SO HAPPY...i want to giggle when i look at it! i'm serious.
The other orchid (the sad, sad one) was forgotten outside in the front yard when i moved. It not onlywent two weeks without water, but got badly sunburned as well.

i decided that i would nurse the sad, sad orchid back to health like i did the other happy one, by trimming the dead brown leaves, keeping it watered, and setting it by the office window which receives almost no direct light. When i brought it in (as part of aforementioned "sprucing up"), the long, bare stem and 2 leaves (one half-yellow from sun damage) got a few raised eyebrows and chuckles, but i was unfazed. i told my office-mates about my intentions and they supported my my experiment with enthusiasm.

i have babied this thing...giving not too much water, but enough to keep it moist (purified water, no less), making sure it gets the right amount of soft light, keeping it clean, adamantly defending its pathetic-ness, et cetera.

All this to say...i think it's dead.

i've always preferred it cloudy

2011-07-21T00:29:00.000-07:00

"Behold, He cometh with clouds."
~Revelation 1:7

"In the Bible clouds are always connected with God. Clouds are those sorrows or sufferings or providences, within or without our personal lives, which seem to dispute the rule of God. It is by those very clouds that the Spirit of God is teaching us how to walk by faith. If there were no clouds, we should have no faith. 'The clouds are but the dust of our Father's feet.' The clouds are a sign that He is there. What a revelation it is to know that sorrow and bereavement and suffering are the clouds that come along with God! God cannot come near without clouds, He does not come in clear shining.

"It is not true to say that God wants to teach us something in our trials: through every cloud He brings, He wants us to unlearn something. His purpose in the cloud is to simplify our belief until our relationship to Him is exactly that of a child - God and my own soul, other people are shadows. Until other people become shadows, clouds and darkness will be mine every now and again. Is the relationship between myself and God getting simpler than ever it has been?

"There is a connection between the strange providences of God and what we know of Him, and we have to learn to interpret the mysteries of life in the light of our knowledge of God. Unless we can look the darkest, blackest fact full in the face without damaging God's character, we do not yet know Him.
'They feared as they entered the cloud . . .' - Is there anyone 'save Jesus only' in your cloud? If so, it will get darker; you must get to the place where there is 'no one any more save Jesus only'."

~Oswald Chambers

thank you, my sweet chad, for reminding me of this. <3

things

2011-07-18T12:54:00.000-07:00

i think i'm in slight panic mode right now...

but i'm working, so that's good. it's fantastic, in fact.
i'm just...weary.

and my face is trying to kill me.

2011-07-12T22:56:00.001-07:00

so much bitter-sweetness.

where is everything going...?

"in"

2011-07-10T00:00:00.000-07:00

baby poop on my washcloth...i think i am officially a member of the household.

just things

2011-07-05T11:24:00.000-07:00

Ian is doing a lot better :) thank you for prayers...they worked. Now waiting to find out what exactly is going on in his little system.

Gwen's 3rd birthday was on Saturday...lots of wondering and pondering of sadness and God's purposes.

On Monday i start my new job on The Ricky Gervais Show.

Yesterday we had a great 4th of July at my mom and dad's...the twins were a hit, as usual. There was an epic photoshoot with them and Caid...i'll later post some of the hilights.

Trying to keep my mind on things good and pure...and to have a perspective of the eternal.

2011-06-28T23:52:00.000-07:00

Sweet Ian is in the hospital again...please pray for him...

...ever a gentle, happy, patient little guy, he's fighting the best he can!

but we need the Lord's help, too.

thank you <3

2011-06-26T00:18:00.000-07:00

oh sweetest gwen

my heart will not believe

you are really gone

i love you so much

and i'm still broken inside with missing you

impaired

2011-06-23T23:52:00.000-07:00

sometimes i put on my glasses when i'm having a hard time hearing something.

"no, mom!"

2011-06-22T21:10:00.000-07:00

i've been listening for no less than 15 minutes to Ginger and Caid talking about animals. Mostly dinosaurs and desert animals. They've come to a point of disagreement... and Caid is now getting a book to prove to Ginger that he knows his facts about iguanas.

(do keep in mind, Caid is 5)

13. shudder.

2011-06-11T17:17:00.001-07:00

Honestly, i don't really trust people that never went through an awkward stage.

unknown

2011-06-10T01:47:00.000-07:00

so much to do...that needs to be done...but how or when is a mystery to me.
i try to pray a lot, to be active and wise in my pursuits...but also wait on God's clarity. it always comes if i am truly patient for it.

waiting is hard.

not waiting and doing what is wrong is harder.

and so, i wait. and just do what i need to do today. (which, at this moment, means going to sleep)

2011-06-09T13:56:00.000-07:00

grey cloudy days compound melancholy. who'd've thought?

Addison's Walk

2011-06-03T14:20:00.000-07:00

I'm sick (again), so i slept in late today. I woke staring out my window, lost in thought, pondering the infinite wonder of this world that God made.
My thoughts led me consider how there is nothing mankind can invent that will ever be truly original, since all we can fathom are things somehow bound by the rules in which we ourselves are created. As fantastical, bizarre and abstract as man can be...everything still utilizes, directly or indirectly, gravitational laws (by use or manipulation), existing colors, biology, senses, engineering, philosophy, and even spirituality...

Just now i was reading a biography called "The Inklings", and read this poem written by J.R.R. Tolkien for C.S. Lewis...

Man, Sub-creator, the refracted Light
through whom is splintered from a single White
to many hues, and endlessly combined
in living shapes that move from mind to mind.
Though all the crannies of the world we filled
With Elves and Goblins, though we dared to build
Gods and their houses out of dark and light,
and sowed the seed of dragons--'twas our right
(used or misused). That right was decayed:
we make still by the law in which we're made.

I read it again.
And smiled in peaceful happiness.

huh

2011-06-02T19:50:00.001-07:00

the internet just kind of...bores me now.

this and that

2011-05-25T21:54:00.000-07:00

Liking this quote.

"Out of 100 men, one will read the Bible, the other 99 will read the Christian."
~D.L. Moody

and THANK YOU for the prayers for Ian...he's doing well. follow up appointment next week. please continue to pray that there will be no infection, and that his fever would go down :)

little boys

2011-05-23T22:26:00.000-07:00

Henry and Ian at 7 months!

little ian is having surgery tomorrow for what might be a kidney problem. they don't know yet.

PLEASE pray for our sweet, beautiful little guy

portraits + clouds

completely...

Gift Of Life

I'm inspired by my darling Ian, and sweet Gwen; and the pure gift of what a healthy life is.

i joined...maybe in 30 days, or 30 years from now i help give that gift.

Please consider for yourself!

no mistakes

News from Ginger

latest from Ginger...

grateful

a little change of pace, i know...

latest from Ginger...

Ian's Progress

twittered

Ian update...

Latest from Ginger.

on our knees

engaged to my best friend

tonight...

thousands of words

Just doesn't look right.

cam and wren

you did, little girl puppet.

Whaaa

heh

this morning

2 years

11.11.11

i'm hungry!

oww my skin--pt 3 (...?)

blady bla

perspective

You don't have a Soul, You are a Soul. You have a body.

-C.S. Lewis

happiest halloween

something's different...

good morning

autumn odes

overcompensating

29th &c~

just rad.

natural

quetzacoatlus

a glimpse into hopelessness

no

alivugber

stay put

waking up was confusing

achoo

birthday!

what the fuh

baby baby

rain really does make everything better.

what am i supposed to be doing again...?

don't mind me, i'm just a restless twenty-something.

oww my skin--pt 3

seriously

shutup

regret

i had a venti americano this morning

noooooooo

oww my skin--pt 2

oww my skin

huh. okay.

i wrote this *really* fast...

arliufgva;rui

hey

today...

all the leaves are brown...because the sun burned them up

backin up

itch i can't scratch

command z

dear photograph

the kids love their netflix

boom

55 years

half awake

qwik-e-wash

view from work

relief

i wrote this really fast...

i've been listening for no less than 15 minutes to Ginger and Caid talking about animals. Mostly dinosaurs and desert animals. They've come to a point of disagreement... and Caid is now getting a book to prove to Ginger that he knows his facts about iguanas.